Part 2: Cashis and Lonnie

As many times as me and Lonnie fucked nothing compared to how used, broken, and hurt I felt at this moment. Lonnie was sweating and moaning as he pounded on my pussy and I laid there in tears. “I'm a put a baby in you.” Lonnie whispered in my ear. “Please don't,” I said Lonnie whispered in my ear. “Please don't,” I said. But he kept going until he busted his nut and unlike normal this time he didn’t pull out. \
When Lonnie was done he rolled off of me breathing hard with a smile on his face. I reached and quickly grabbed my towel to go to the bathroom. Lonnie put his arm around me tightly, bringing me closer to him, and then kissed my forehead before asking “where are you going?” with his eyes still closed.
A piece of me was trying to understand when he became Ike and I became Tina. “lonnie i got to pee.” I told him. “Nah you good.” he answered back. “No, I really have to pee.” I told him. “Nah you aint about to go piss my nut out of you.” he said pulling me in tighter. Clearly, Lonnie was crazy for real and that's exactly how I was looking at him. “Lonnie, you're holding me too tight and your hurting e.” I said “then go to sleep,” he told me.
Everything in me wishes i had something in my hand to take his mutha fucking head off his shoulders. Matter fact I wish I left his no good ass in jail where he clearly belonged. If loonie didn’t cause me enough stress now we could add rape to the number of things on the list that he had done to me. It was amazing how my night went from one I never wanted to get to one I wanted to completely erase from my mind.
I laid there for a few moments perfectly still and waited for Lonnie to become sleepy enough for me to slide from under his arm. When I heard him snoring I decided to make my move. I was halfway out of the room when I heard him say. “I thought I told your ass to go to bed.” I turned around and looked at him. “ I told you I had to pee.” I said. “And I told you, you were going to have my baby,” he said back. “Lonnie stopping me from going to the bathroom is not going to guarenette me getting pregnant by you.” I said to him.
“Are you saying you don't want to have my baby?” he said with this scary look in his eyes I’m just saying please let me go to the bathroom.” I pleaded “Cashis get your ass back in this bed before you make me mad and then you won’t like me.” he said. “I don’t like you now. I mumbled “what you say?” he said as he sat up in the bed “nothing,” i said walking back over to the bed.
I got into the bed and held myself like I was a scared kid. Lonnie grabbed me from behind and threw his leg over me and wrapped his arms tightly around me. He drifted off back to sleep while I cried silently.
Morning came and I was in bed alone. I got up and walked through my house and Lonnie was nowhere to be found. My keys were missing out of my purse and my car was not outside in the driveway. “Where the fuck could a nigga with no job possibly go this early in the morning.'' I picked up my phone and dialed Lonnie's number and the phone rang about three times before he answered. “Yeah,” he said “I need my car. I have to go to work.” I told him. “I’ll be back,” he answered. “When?” i asked “when i get back.” he said “come on now Lonnie doesn't make me late for work,” i said and he hung up.
I looked at the clock and it was already (:30am i had to be at work by 11 am. I picked my phone back up. “Hello?” I heard Shawna say after a few rings. “Hey girl, I'm sorry to bother you but is there any way I can get a ride to work? Lonnie has my car and I'm not sure what time he is going to make it back. I told her. “Sure girl no problem,” she said cheerfully. “Thank you so much,'' I told her. “It's no problem boo I'm finishing getting dressed now and then I’ll be with you by 10:15,” she told me. “Okay no problem let me get dressed,” i said get off the phone with her.
I rushed and took a showered and did my best to scrub the feeling of Lonnie off me. As the water ran down my body all I could do was cry. When I got out of the shower I quickly got dressed just in time for when Shawna pulled fup.
I rushed outside and got in her car. Shawna pulled off. But she kept looking at me. “You good?” she said to me looking at me funny. “Yeah I'm cool but can we stop at Walgreens or CVS.,” i asked “yeah no problem. I need to get something to drink for work anyways.” she told me. “Yeah me too,” I said to Shawna as I pulled out my wallet to see if I had my insurance card. Then I checked my phone to see how much money I had in my bank account.
When Shawna pulled up to CVS I stopped her from getting out. “I'll grab your drink what you want?” I told her. “Nah I'll get it because I want to get a smart water, red bull and pepsi that way I'm good for the whole day.” she told me “Nah its cool I'll grab it since you picked me up it's the least i can do.” I said. I told her quickly as I got out of the car and went into the store.
I walked to the back of the store, the pharmacy area. “Can I get a morning-after pill? I asked the young white girl at the corner. She looked me up and down like she was judging me in her head. “Now,” I said as I rolled my eyes. She walked away and I figured I would grab Shawna and I drinks while she got my order. When I got back to the counter the girl rang me up but kept staring at me funny as she knew me. After I paid for the stuff I grabbed the bag, rolled my eyes, and walked out.
As i exited the store a text came through from Lonnie saying Where the fuck you at? I got in the car, sat the bag down, and responded on my way to work. He texted me back quickly. How? As I was typing back my response that Shawna had given me a ride I heard Shawna call out my name. “Cah what is this?’ she said holding the morning after pill i snatched the pill from her. “Nothing just something I needed,” I told her. “Something you needed?” she asked “yeah now can we go to work,” i asked. “Nah Cash we are going to talk first. Tell me what is going on. You are not acting like yourself. You got in the car and your whole vibe wasn’t the same. “ she said to me. “It's nothing,” I told her.
A smile came over Shawna's face. “Did you and Marlon fuck last night? Oh girl that's nothing to be ashamed of. Every female done had a hoe moment when she let a dude fuck on the first night and then had to take one of these pills the next morning. I did it more than once if we are honest. Niggas always get me with the let me just put it in a little bit. Shit my son was made off of letting his damn daddy put it in a little bit. Cheer up take the pill so boo it's a no judgement zone. Once you take it make sure you get tested too. I don’t care how good these niggas seem they still be aint shit. “ she told me.
I looked at her with tears in my eyes. “That's not what happened to me.” I said to her. “Then what happened because now you're scaring me?” she said “I …. I… I…” I kept repeating. “You what?” she asked. “I was raped…” I finally spit out. “What! By who?” Shawna yelled. “Lonnie… he got mad about me going on a date and when i came home last night he… he… he rapped me. Can i even call it rape. I have been giving it up to him willingly all this time.” I said. “Hell yes its rape at any time if you said no, or you dont want to, or for him to get off you Cash its rape. It doesn't matter how many times before it was willing. Tears started to stream down my face faster “why me… he raped me… why me...