Noah and Tammy Part 2

It seems like when we know when something isn’t right it's so much easier to try to pretend like you, not the reason why. Part of me wanted to blame what Noah and I had going on on everything and everybody else. I had even got myself to believe that if Jasmine was doing what she needed to has his wife. Noah would have never looked my way. I had also started to believe that if my pussy wasn’t so good his ass wouldn’t keep coming back. The biggest lie I had feed myself lately was that if God didn't want us together he wouldn’t have let it happen. But the truth was we were here because Noah wanted his cake and to eat it too. But it wasn’t just him I wanted to be wanted so bad that I had settled for being wanted when a married man made time for me. And that why we are here.
“Here we are,” I said to myself as I sat in my car and let out a deep sigh. There was a knock on my car window and it made me jump. “You ready?” my best friend Rochelle asked me. I looked at her for a little while and then took a deep breath grab my purse off the passenger seat and opened my door and stepped out. “You okay?” Rochelle said as she looked at me. “I can’t believe i’m here.” i said looking at the planned parenthood building.
Rochelle looked at the building with me. “Its okay. Sometimes what we never expect to be doing works out for our good.” she said to me in a positive voice. “Can’t see how this will work out for my good.” I said to her. “You may not be able to see it right now. But exactly you will.” she said as she smiled. I let out another deep breath, But my feet didn’t move to walk to the building. Rochelle must have picked up on it cause she reached out and grabbed my hand. “I got you.” she said to me. I looked at her with my eyes all watery. Her words were simple but exactly what I needed to hear.
I started heading to the door and my heart started to race. Planned parenthood always had protesters outside and they were making this walk very uncomfortable for me. They were shouting out things and for someone that wasn’t scared easily, I felt a little fear. Rochelle must have seen how I was looking around at the protestors because she held my hand just a little tighter. I looked over at her and she smiled.
Friends like her didn’t come around too often. I meat her during my freshman year of high school and now here were juniors in college and we're so close i felt she was like a sister to me. I went to her about anything. I told her everything. She was always so peaceful, positive, gave great advice, and didn’t judge. I don't know if it was all the yoga she did, or the meditation or even the weed she smoked. But she was definitely the balance i needed in life.
But don't get it twisted. Positive as she was. That hood side of her still lived in her and she was always with the shit. I remember one time we were in the club and a guy was getting aggressive with me. Before the bouncers could get to me to help me. Rochelle had taken her beer and hit the guy over the head with it, grabbed my hand. She walked out of the club calm as nothing had happened.
When we got to the door a black lady stepped out in front of us. “Excuse me ma’am we need to go inside.” Rochelle said. The lady looked at the both of us “remember everything w do in private or behind closed doors has a consequence that yu can’t out run or get rid of.” she said. I put my head down. “Shame is a clue that you are about to do something you shouldn’t. Remember god is watch don’t go to hell over something you could have faced.” the lady said. “Thank you for the knowledge now can you move.” Rochelle said this time with a little attitude. The lady slid to the side and Rochelle pulled my arm and we stepped into the building.
When we stepped in my head was still down. Rochelle stood in from of me and lifted my head. “Listen don’t let what that lady said eat at you. She don’t know you or what you here for. Nor does she have a heaven or hell to put you in. GOd knows your heart and he knows your situation. Only him and you can make the decision that's best for you. Now lift your head and do what you feel is best for you. No matter what it is I will stand by you. But your going to do it with pride like the bad bitch that you are.”
I nodded my head to what Rochelle said and I straighten up. My nerves hadn’t gone away but we were here now. It seemed like the building was gloomy and cold. The hallways seem so long like we were walking forever just to get to the check-in window.
When we got to the desk the woman sitting there reminded me of the crazy psychopaths you seen in the scary movies. She was super happy and bubbly. “Hello there and good afternoon, welcome to planned parent hood. How can i help you tday.” she said with a smile that went from one ear to the other. “I have an appointment for an abortion,” I whispered. “Sorry I didn’t hear you.” the lady said still smiling. I took a deep breath and repeated myself still in a low tone but this shower my body towards her. “Ma’am i do aplogize but I am unable to hear you can you speak up for me.” she asked me. “I’m here for a fucking abortion and damn abortion can you fucking hear me now.” i yelled now angry. “Tammy” Rochelle said as she rubbed my back trying to get me to relax and calm down.
“Oh okay. Name.” the lady said now in a low tone as she started typing on her computer. “Tammy Evans.” i responded rolling my eyes. The lady got me checked in and then handed me a clipboard with papers to fill out and told me to have a seat I’d be called back shortly.
Rochelle and I walked over to the waiting area and sat down. I shook my head. “oh , that's all she could say. Not a aplogie or anything.” i said. “Just relax Tammy your just worked up she meant no harm/” Rochelle told me. “Yeah okay.” i said to her in a sarcastic voice and then I looked down and started to fill out the paperwork. “So how did meating with Noah to tell him about the baby and your decision go?” Rochelle asked. I kept looking at the paper I was filling out and I said nothing. “Tammy?” i turned and looked at her like a sad child. “Yu did tell him. Right?” she asked. I just looked at her. “Tammy?” she said. “ I was going to,” i said. “What stopped you.” she asked. I gave her a look “Tammy you fucked him when you were supposed to be telling him about the baby?” she asked. “It happen so quickly” i answer.
Rochelle shook her head. “Now you judging me too?” i asked her. “Not at all. But I did feel like he atleast has to right to know about the baby.” she told me. “What for he won’t care. His wife is pregnant.” i said to her. “Damn are you serious.” Rochelle asked. Before i could say anything the door opened and a woman stepped out and called my name. Rochelle and I got up and we followed the lady to the back.
We got into the room and the nurse introduced herself. Then began to ask me questions. “So why are you here today?” i rolled my eyes.”what does your chart say.” i answered. “Aboirption” the nurse answered. “Okay then.” i said back with an attitude. “And are yo doing this of your own free will?” she asked. “Yes,” i said back. The nurse asked me a few more questions and I gave her more answers with an attitude. After a while she said. “Okay well I’ll send the door in”
When she walked out and the door close Rochelle asked me “are you okay?” i looked at her in the eyes and said “hell nah” my heart was racing to the point i could hear it beating in my ears and I felt like it was going to pop out my chest. My mouth was watery like i had to throw up, i was hot and my hand was sweaty as rubbed them together.
It seemed like forever until the doctor walked back in looking at my chart. “Ms. Evans nice to see you again.” Dr. James said as she closed the door. “Yeah i guess,” i said back to her. “You brought support,” she said looking at Rochelle. “Yeah that's my best friend Rochelle she knows everything so i feel comfortable with her here,” i said. “That's great a friend is definitely needed at a time like this. So lay back I’m going to do a basic exam before we go forward. I laid back and Dr. James pressing on my belly and examining me. “Have you had any discomfort?” she asked. “No? I wouldn’t have known I was pregnant had i not missed my period everything feels normal.” i examed. “And how about the chlamydia did you take all the medicine to clear that up?” the doctor asked. I looked over at Rochelle and she looked at me. That was maybe the one thing I didn’t tell. That Naoh had given me. “Yes,” i answered back. “Okay good you can sit up” the doctor instructed.
“So before i walk out and let you prepare yourself i just need to tell you some things. After this, we advise you to wait at least two weeks before having sex. You will experience some bleeding, that is normal. You can also experience abdominal cramps, nausea and vomiting, sore breasts, and fatigue. And less common possible infection. But as long as you wait to have sex and use pads instead of tampons infection won’t happen.” the words the doctor was saying was racing through my head and I was trying not to panic. “Now because you aren't so far along you have two options i can handle this surgically for you or this pill will do the same job.” the doctor said as she put the pill on the corner. “But please understand that with whichever way you decided to go Incomplete or failed abortion is possible, in which the fetus is still viable or was not fully evacuated from the womb. This can cause serious medical complications. So I’m going to step outlet you take in all that i said and I'll be back for us to proceed.
The doctor stepped out and the panic took over me. “What the fuck am I doing? Infection? Incomplete or failed abortion? What the fuck?” i said holding my head. Rochelle got up and walked over to me. “Relax and breath,” she said. “I can’t the walls are closing in on me I can’t breath.” I said to her. “So what do you want to do?” she asked me. “I want to get the fuck out of here.” I said getting up. “Okay let me go find the doctor.” Rochelle said opening the door and stepping out.
I paced back and forth in the room feeling like i couldn’t catch my breath. “I got to get the fuck out of here I can’t breath,” i said to myself Finally i looked at the corner grabbed the pill the doctor had left. I grabbed my purse and i ran. I ran out the door ignoring the lady at the front desk yelling that i needed to check out. I bust through the front doors of the building and ran through the crowd of the protestor to my car. When i got in i pulled off with no second-guessing.


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